……is that if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. Yes, I will probably reference/quote/mis-judge/bum any number of films throughout my time writing on this here blog.
To give you a rough idea of the sort of person I am (or at least think I am, or at least want to be….i think) then I’ll give you the low down on how I came to make a film called Snakes & Apples – a poem about Love, Loss, Friendship & Ketamine, and all of the pretentiousness that comes with those umbrellaric terms.
I will keep this short.
I originally got the idea in September of 2006, wanting to tackle a religious film for a few years, obviously what I had in my head then is, for better or worse or lack of a better excuse, not a thing like what has ended up on facebook/youtube/vimeo today. After battling the elements of leaving full time education, getting a part time job and the general difficultness of having a social life and relationship(s) I began writing and re-writing and re-re-writing. And then gave up. for. a. long. time.
….but then I started again…
March 2007.
Got my shit together and then couldn’t make it. I was under the assumption that I wasn’t ‘ready’ to make it and needed more time to work on the script. I didn’t have enough money to make it either, so I copped out by making this little sandwhich-filler of a film called ‘925’ –
After that, I got back into ‘Snapples’ and found it near impossible to get all the people involved together at the same time for when I needed them, nevertheless I endured the process and eventually got the ball rolling on what would be a three year production on a script that wasn’t even six pages long, gaining over eight hours of footage and costing me about a grand (along with what little sanity I had).
My logic is pretty impressive, and I’ll tell you why. I waited to get a tax rebate that I would spend on equipment to shoot Snapples (in September 2007), then I would sell that equipment and use the money to go on holiday to Los Angeles (in February 2008). I wouldn’t bother telling you this if I didn’t think it was at least a tiny bit funny, and if you’ve read this far you’ll probably be amused by what follows.
So, come Feb 2008 im about a quarter of my way through snapples, which I thought would be done by October at the latest, and that’s shot, edited, equipment sold, holiday booked etc. No, that was not the plan for me apparently. I somehow managed to book this holiday on no money.
Karma exists.
My camera brakes due to having a fist fight with the dirty ground, taking along with it the lens and mic, lost about a grand in blood. Shit. I wont bore you with the trivial details of how I managed to sort that out, something to do with failed fraud and credit card bills too big to mention. Anyway I get a new cam sorted after my nice little trip to the city of angels.
And back we go, of course I had to wait till the summer holidays to get all the people back together. waiting. waiting. waiting. Now that I think about it I actually have no idea what I did during these months of stalled production….hmmm….
We get back on it and have a fucking amazing time, I remember the summer being incredibly hot, giving some great natural lighting for me and much needed enthusiasm for the cast J. So we get everything we want need….
That’s a wrap? Yea?
No. I wasn’t happy. So I designed some re-shoots. Having to wait for the lead to grow his hair back after having it cut cause he was going to some festival (), I decided to make another one of those sandwhich-filler films, like ‘925’. I think I had this idea of 925 being something to get me back into the swing of things cause it had been quite awhile since id picked up a camera, and this next filler was to ‘keep the juices going’, cinematically speaking. A way to not let motivation waver, and keep me on my toes, maybe. This film was compute –
Bad scheduling and just a general lack of knowledge led me to simultaneously be shooting Compute and what was left of Snakes & Apples at the same time. It gets better. I planned to sell my filming equipment to buy the editing equipment needed. I somehow managed to sell the majority of my equipment whilst keeping hold of my camera, lens and mic (the new working ones). So I could shoot these two films and edit them allllllllll at the same time. I subsequently dropped all filming aspirations as my new mac (final cut pro studio included) was an insane distraction that lead to the procrastination of my life, like this-
but also contributed creatively, like this –
Impressive? Not really, I wouldn’t say im massively proud of my failure to work properly, but its how I worked and to an extent it did work, at least I think so. I could just be so short sighted that im even using this video to justify my unprofessionalism....
Anyway, I finished shooting both films in march 2009, finished the edits around may, and that’s pretty much it. Im more than reluctant to get back into anything, in fact…to say ive ‘always wanted to make films’, that how-ever-many-years-long little episode has mentally scarred me, and probably crippled me as a film-maker for the rest of my life. I think I have my friends to thank for that.
Sticking to the safety of pen and paper from now on.
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